Escape From Tennessee

We packed up from Nashville finally, and began making our long trek back home. Christine had asked if we could stop by Smokey Mountain National Park on the way, but it was getting late and would be dark by the time we got there. We didn't plan on making any more stops in Tennessee, until we saw signs for one of the last great country mountain ranges.

DOLLYWOOD!

Dollywood is located about 20 minutes off of exit 407 in a very touristy area. There are literally dozens of arcades, go cart areas, miniature golf, hotels and any sort of family fun attraction you can think of really. We got to Dollywood in time to see it closing and we literally drove into the parking lot and drove out. Meaning we are now 2-2 in getting to a place on time, to see it closing.

We got a room at a Best Western and found our accommodations surprisingly accommodating. Finding a place at a reasonable price, that is clean and orderly would have been enough, but this room came with an added bonus. Hot tub! Very relaxing and being able to actually have a full bath and shower was a nice change from the small, uncomfortable showers we had been used to being on the road for so long.

We priced out Dollywood tickets and found them unreasonably expensive. It costs 53.00 to get in.. per person, and being this close to home and our funds beginning to diminish, and really not liking Dolly Parton enough to go there, we decided to pass on Dollywood and get back on the road.

The road led us into a town outside of Knoxville called, Gatlinburg. Gatlinburg is again, a very touristy area. Lots of family friendly entertainment venues, including the world famous, Ripley's Believe It Or Not, where we decided to visit this fine day.

Ripley's had many interesting facts, fun optical illusions and shrunken heads. One thing that was clear was that Mr. Ripley led a very fascinating life, and the museum does its best to represent it. At times it seems like it looses focus and puts ascetics and flair in front of the things Ripley found throughout his life time.

Highlights-

Phil- A locke of George Washington's hair.

Christine- Holograms, sword swallowers and the "sticking shadow".

Lowlights-

Phil- A picture and life sized replica of an 8'2" man. Why can't they have the man there? Why should I have to look at an 8'2" giant candle that is supposed to be a wax figure of him?

Christine- Would have liked more hands on interaction.

At the end of the tour there is a Zoltar fortune telling machine, similar to the one seen in the Tom Hanks classic "Big". Christine got her fortune from Zoltar, and unlike the one from "Big" this one was plugged in. It is fitting that the tour ended with a replica from Tom Hanks movie, because our next stop led us into another Hanks classic.

The Bubba Gump Shrimp Company, from the Hanks classic, "Forrest Gump," where we went for lunch.

(Side Note: I think there is a small list of celebrities who get so famous that they stop doing stuff and get to a point where they can just do whatever they want. I put Tom Hanks on the top of this list. Followed by people like Garth Brooks, Julia Roberts, and Madonna. Sure there are more people so famous they can do whatever they want, if you can list some feel free to add names when you comment)

A real fast run down. Fun environment, the drink menu on a ping pong paddle, and license plates donning the famous quotes, "run Forrest run" and "Stop Forrest stop". The plates are used to call the attention of the waitstaff when you need something. The walls are covered in pictures taken during the filming of Forest Gump, along with signs that reference scenes from the film, and other quirks that tie into the time period. The food was really good (better than you would think, but no "Cock of he Walk").

One thing that bothered me was the music. Don't get me wrong, I think Madonna's Greatest Hits and "Puttin' On The Ritz" by Taco all have their place in music history and American society, I just didn't think they fit in with the ambiance and the place. Perhaps music from the soundtrack, or more pieces that were around during the generations that the film spanned would have been more appropriate.

We spent the rest of the day driving and the long road is finally drawing to a close. We will try to sit down and update the blog when we get home.

Jack Daniel's, The Cock of the Walk

Three quick points before we begin.

1) I was surprised to hear a few day ago that there was a war brewing in Georgia. I really thought there was some racial or family tension that had been brewing, Hatfield and McCoy style that finally blew up. Boy, was I shocked to find out Georgia was a small Russian satellite country. And to think all this time I thought it was a state in the U.S. I don't remember traveling that far to visit Christine's family. And to Curt and Colleen, stay strong and don't let those forces over take your home or your spirit.

2) I noticed today that I am developing a southern twang when I say certain words. When I arrive back in the northeast, please feel free to greet to me with a kick in the shin or a slap on the wrist whenever certain words come out with a southern drawl.

3) We have spent some time reading Mitch Albom books and have realized a few key points. 1) We are both now realizing we must be ready for death, and to do that we must enjoy life, and 2) While Mitch Albom is not the best writer I have ever read, he is the best story teller, and a sit down of his books is needed. None take a long time, because (again) he is such a fine story teller, you never want to put down the book.

On to the blog

We started off with a trip to one of the last great slices of Americana, The Jack Daniels Distillery in Lynchburg, Tennessee. Phil checked out the website and noticed that they give tours every 15minutes from 9:00am- 6:15pm. There are two ultimate ironies to this story. The first being that Lynchburg is one of the last 'dry' counties in the United States. That's right, in the home of Jack Daniel's No7 Whiskey.. you can't actually drink the whiskey.

It sounds odd, but it makes sense. The brew was banned during prohibition, and when the law was repealed, Lynchburg found it important to leave the ban intact. After visiting a town like Interior, S.D., it's obvious to see why it makes sense. Lynchburg, is the smallest county in Tennessee, and the majority of the people work either in the J.D. distillery or in some facit of it in the area. A small area like this, with a near overabundant supply of whiskey could easily turn from wonderful small town, tourist trap, into ..well.. Interior. A small town with nice enough people, who allow the perils and irresponsibility's of living in a small town to take advantage of them. They seem to respect the law and what the distillery means to the community.

We arrived at 5:00, which was a bad thing. Phil had read the website wrong and the last tour was at 4:30 and not 6:15. We had traveled an hour and arrived in enough time to see nothing but a locked door. Christine walked around the building and found a door where people from the last tour were leaving out of and we used that opportunity to more or less sneak into the museum area. Christine explained to one of the women working there our predicament and how we had traveled so far, and she told us to walk around for a bit, and she would re-fire up the 5 minute introductory film they show before the tour an allow us to view it. While she got it ready we walked around a bit and went to the store to buy some Jack Daniel's (which we would not be able to drink here). The following conversation took place:

Lady- We have these 4 different bottles available today. The first has a picture and story of a man whittling and what it means to the distillery, the second has Jack Daniel himself on the front and these two are in a remembrance of two of our five awards that we have won. Which of the four would you like to buy?

Phil- (pause)

Christine- (pause) ..we'll..

Phil- Great, we'll take one of each.

Christine- One of each.?.?

Phil- We traveled a long way to get here. We are going home with something. We will give a couple away, and we will keep a couple for ourselves, or do something with it.

After we made our purchase we made our way to the next great irony in our story. We were led into a small movie theater, where we were the only two seated and the nice woman who Christine had spoken to earlier allowed us to view the brief introductory film, where we learned great fact like Jack Daniel was on 5'2" tall, and that J.D. is literally poured through cedar coal as part of its distilleration process. What is so ironic about this? We taped the movie, and made a bootleg in the whiskey museum.

After the film we walked around a bit more and posed infront of the No7 Jack Daniel's Clint Bowyer car, which is in the museum as well as read some interesting facts about the distilleration process, the history of Jack Daniel and Lynchburg County, Tenn.

We didn't get the full tour, which was my own (Phil's) fault. But we did get to experience part of the tour at least, and get idea of what happened there and the process involved, which was still pretty cool.

We proceeded our way to camp and had decided we would have dinner at the place next door, "The Cock of the Walk", upon getting a positive recommendation from a fellow camper.

Now in my life time I (Phil) have heard the term "Cock of the Walk" used twice. The first was on the famous SNL 'Cowbell' sketch, by the immortal Christopher Walken. (Listen Close, it's there.) The second time was in "Jeepers Creepers 2" a teen horror flick, when one guy challenges another to a fight. Even with there previous context clues, I was never able to truly decipher the meaning of the term, "Cock of the Walk".

Thankfully the restaurant menu cleared up the confusion. Boats used to go up and down the Mississippi bringing supplies and trading good to New Orleans. Each of these different trading boats had their own champion fighter, a.k.a "The Cock of the Walk". When one boat came across another boat, the "Cock of the Walk" of each boat would fight each other boat's champion fighter to see who would reign supreme as the true, "Cock of the Walk' a.k.a The Best of the Best.

Isn't that easy enough?

On to the Cock of the Walk's ambiance and food. The place has a rustic feel, and we both got a kick out of the beer being served in small tin cups.

Phil had the fried catfish, while Christine had the 'Red Feather Platter' that had a little bit of chicken, fish and shrimp in it. It was all served with coleslaw, skillet bread, fries and hush puppies. All of the food was wonderful, some of the best we have had.

As we were leaving we stopped by the store to get a "Cock of the Walk" shirt, just to make sure we had something to prove this entire experience and place really existed. We came up with a bit more that. First is this great picture of Christine in a giant rocking chair they have there.While we were taking our pictures we stumbled upon some lovely women, who were staying at the Gaylord Opryland Hotel for the gospel music convention that was being held there, who heard us talking and asked where we were from. When Christine told them we were from New York, we learned we had a bunch in common with our new friends. One was from Rockland (Spring Valley), one was from Westchester (Ossining) and finally Brooklyn. More or less the outline of Christine and Phil's lives were standing in front of them in the form of gospel women from the New York metropolitan area.

Funny how New York is the ultimate in similarities from the people you least expect it from sometimes.

2 More notes:

1) Yes, Phil does have a French detective mustache. He hasn't shaved since the day before the wedding. Bad facial hair was bound to happen.

2) Phil has vowed to wear the Adam Dunn jersey until he gets home as a show of solidarity to Adam despite his recent trade to the Diamondbacks. Christine recently remarked that it smells of "B.O."

Kentucky tomorrow...

I found it...

I found the picture of the Moose we saw in the badlands.... Aparently Phil didn't post it 'cause he didn't want everyone to know he was wrong.

Answer: Moose are not too good for the badlands!

You're The Only Tennessee

First off here is a picture of one of the aforementioned insects we saw in Oklahoma. It was a large flying type creature that was carrying the corpse of a green caterpillar that was roughly twice its size. The fact it was carrying its body led us to believe that it had also killed the caterpillar, meaning it was a predator and could theoretically bite us and infect us with its dirty poison.

Arkansas more or less got rained out. We spent one day in a Hotel and another day at the local KOA. Some good things about this was that it gave us some down time and allowed Christine to get some of our pictures developed, and begin a fabulous photo album of the trip.

Another positive thing on this trip was spending some time in Hot Springs and drinking some of their wonderful water. The majority of the Hot Springs have been covered up to "prevent contamination," or in other words, "so we can charge you 16$ a head to come in and soak in the hot springs". The remaining 3 springs that were left uncovered are hidden in woods somewhere, and were difficult to get to, especially with their bad Arkasonian maps and poor weather conditions.

We were able to stop by a water fountain that featured some of the best natural spring water we have ever had. Phil took the video camera and taped footage of him filling up a water bottle. It is riveting footage and dialogue with the natives, one of which bore a startling resemblance to Locke from Lost.

The drive from Arkansas to Tennessee wasn't bad, only about 6 hours, however at the end of it we did realize that we would soon need our second oil change of the trip. Tennessee is a nice area upon entry and the first thing noticed upon entering is the police presence. There were days on this trip where we could go 2-3 days down an other wise deserted road and never see a cop. Once you enter Tennessee there are cops everywhere. All over the highway, on the side roads, everywhere, state, local, sheriffs, traffic cops, anything. So needless to say, you feel very safe, just don't speed.

The first day we were here, we just came in, set up the tent and crashed. The second day we went to Nashville and the Country Music Hall of Fame, The Wildhorse Saloon and the Gaylord Opry Resort and Hotel. The Country Music Hall of Fame was interesting. They had gold, platimun, silver, records on the walls, the history of country music, how it formed and grew into what it was today. There was a film on the history of country music on television that featured some icons of country like, Hank Williams, Johnny Cash, Dolly Parton and of course the immortal Jeff Foxworthy. If your idea of an educational experience is visiting the country music museum... than you just might be a redneck.

Here I am hanging out with the great Kris Kristofferson.

The two big icons of country music are Hank Williams Sr. and Johnny Cash. Both remembered for their great upbeat harmonies, inovative cross-over beats, "every
man" lyrics, and of course having major alcohol and drug dependencies that killed one and almost ruined the other, and cost both to leave their families (Cash pre June Carter of course).




After the Hall of Fame we walked down Broadway in Nashville. It is covered with small gift shops and Honky- Tonks. We were both looking for something to eat, and found a great place The Wildhorse Saloon. It is actually kind of a big deal down here, as they have filmed TV shows there, have some concerts there with some reletively big name stars and have frequent radio shows there as well. The fact that they also serve award winning BBQ didn't hurt either. Lunch was good, we had pulled pork and chicken chili as was suggested by the waitress.

When we left downtown Nashville we returned to the area, about a mile or two, outside of our camp, where the Grand Ole Opry and the Gaylord Opry Land Hotel and Resort are located. The Grand Ole Opry is literally just a big old house that realy gives no evidence of being one of the most influential and timeless music houses in American history. The Gaylord Opry Hotel, now there is a magnificant structure.

The hotel has an old, classic look from the outside, but the inside is all new looking, and literally websoff into different areas. The webbed areas are connected with huge glass covered atriums, with some spectacular flowers, plants, water falls, indoor rivers, and stores located inside. Rooms from the hotel have balconies that over looks the atriums and whether it be morning or night time, the views of this area from these rooms must be spectacular.

We finally headed back to camp and took it easy for a few hours before heading back into Nashville so we could frequent some of the evening Honky Tonks and hear some mediocre bands play good country and rock music poorly. And let me tell you we were not dissapointed. We stopped at a few different places (a brief description of the band playing appears in parathesize next to the name of the place), The Stage (over top lead singer.. didn't want to be a country coverband, but in Nashville there is little room for anything else), Roberts (blue grass, decent if thats what you like.. we didn't.), Second Fiddle (Fun, interactive country, as we walked in they were playing Interstate Lovesong), Legends (In their 30's nothing spectacular, but enjoyable), Random Honky-Tonk 1 (older band who yelled at us for coming in at the end of the set), Random Honky- Tonk 2 (band had mailed it in an hour before we go there).

Two weird things about this experience. 1) In Legends we met people who live in Queens, one origionally from Suffern, N.Y. and another orgionally from New Haven County C.T. It's a small world after all. 2) In Nashville the bands do not get paid. They rely on the tips of bar patrons. Which is an awkward thing the first time a groupie comes up to you with a barrel asking you to tip the band, and you have no idea why.

We had made some plans for today, but found sleeping in a bit more to our liking. Lunch now, and then who knows maybe a trip to a very special place not too far from where we are now. For dinner tonight it looks like we will be going to the restaurant right next to the camp site, "Cock of the Walk'.

Oklahoma! Arkansas?

I have found that the mere mention of Oklahoma will bring people to immediately sing the state's name in show tune form, while an explanation of the place is being given. Phil drew the straw for the Oklahoma duty and let me say the 2 nicest things I can about the state,


1) The gas is cheap. 3.44 a gallon in some spots

2) There is no 2.

It is hot as hell, by far the hottest place on Earth. You might say, "Phil, how is it possible that it is that hot?" Simple. Christine and I have been to at least 14 states thus far and this one is by far the hottest. Seeing as how America does everything the best, I must infer that we are the best at having the hottest place on Earth.

I had this conversation with a gas station attendant today...

Me- Hot out there today. Is it normally this hot out here?

Him- No.

Me- Well that's good.

Him- It's normally hotter

NOTE: IT WAS 97... THE TEMPERATURE HAS HIT 110 FOR THE LAST 5 DAYS!


Another awful thing about Oklahoma are the bugs. Good lord, just the scariest, biggest, most annoying, things on Earth. They crawl, fly, swarm, bite, nip, suck, an bother like no other. They have ants everywhere and these wasp looking things that have a red torso with black wings that are the size of a half dollar flying around.

After setting up the tent here and disinfecting it with pesticide and citronella candles we decided to head into Oklahoma City into Toby Keith's restaurant.

For those of you who not know, Toby Keith is a country musician who is big for hits like, "Beer For My Horses", "Courtesy of The Red, White and Blue", and "I Love This Bar." He must be very creative because he named this place "Toby Keith's I Love This Bar & Grill".

Upon entering, Chris and I took a seat at the bar because the wait would have been at least 30minutes or a table an I think we were both hungry since we hadn't eaten since breakfast. (Breakfast as a quick side note included a breakfast buffet at a truck stop and biscuits an gravy were of course a major player in the game.) We ordered drinks and food. As an appitizer we ha "the tumble weed." Which is a lot like a Bloomin' Onion, only with thinner onions crisps that are tangled together so it looks like a tumble weed. I had the sirloin and shrimp. Both were a bit too well done for my liking. The steak a bit dry, the shrimp despite a wonderful seasoning on top was a bit chewy, but still tasty and better than most of the stuff out there. Christine ha spare ribs, that literally were falling of the bone. Simply fantastic, along with her side dishes had an A+ meal.

The next day we left at about 11 for Arkansas. The original plan was to head for Little Rock, but after looking at the map and plotting times, Hot Springs seemed a bit more reasonable. The hotel we are in is an older place, where the room keys are just that... keys. Our first room was small and we had some problems with the cold water, so they move us down the hall to a much nicer room at the same price. Don't know why we had the crappy room first, or why they moved us to a much nicer room, but I won't complain. The downside is that they make you pay for wireless internet, which is bothersome at first, until you remember you are in Arkansas and should feel fortunate to have electricity.

The downside is that they make you pay for wireless internet, which is bothersome at first, until you remember you are in Arkansas and should feel fortunate they have paved highways.. let alone information super highways.

The downside is that they make you pay for wireless internet, which is bothersome at first, until you remember you are in Arkansas and are fortunate not to be staying at the Tyson Chicken Farm.

The downside is that they make you pay for wireless internet, which is bothersome at first, until you remember you are in Arkansas and you should feel fortunate you weren't directed to your room via hunch backed, candle led, bell boy.

The downside is that they make you pay for wireless internet, which is bothersome at first, until you remember you are in Arkansas and feel fortunate that they don't think "internet" is a term used to describe interfamily relations.

The downside is that they make you pay for wireless internet, which is bothersome at first, until you remember you are in Arkansas and you realize the thing that should bother you is the older, Dolly Parton looking, fake blonde, woman sitting in the corner of the hotel bar shooting all the men weird, lonely glances.

The downside is that they make you pay for wireless internet, which is bothersome at first, until you remember you are in Arkansas and this older, rustic hotel is actually state of the art. We are fortunate they don't use the telegraph to communicate with the outside world.

Okay done for now... more stuff tomorrow.

Bernard's missing testicles and the 2 mile train

Before I can begin with today’s order of events, I must introduce our neighbor from last night, we’ll call him Bernard. Phil and I are sitting at our site, Phil’s reading a book, and I’m uploading pictures for the blog. All of a sudden we hear a voice, “Ya hear those trains?” Mind you, it’s almost pitch black, the only light we have is from our miniature fire, and our lantern which happens to be burning out.

Upon a closer look, we notice Bernard approaching, bare-chested with Jeans and suspenders. However, the hair on his body was enough to fool anyone into thinking he was wearing a sweater. So, we engage in a (hopefully) short conversation with him. He talks about the trains, and how some of them are 2 miles long. When Phil mentions the one we saw earlier, and how I had said, “That train’s got to be at least a mile long”, Bernard was offended and quickly corrected us… “not 1 mile, 2 miles.”

Bernard continues talking about how he and his wife are traveling, and they were trying to get to see their friend Adelia, but they didn’t make it in time and she was taken by cancer. Well, that was sad, but then he continues to tell us about how he has had all sorts of cancer as well. Breast, liver, “Hell, I even lost both my testicles to cancer.” Well, I hate to sound unsympathetic, ‘cause I do feel bad for the guy, losing both testicles must be rough, but really….. Is this something I need to know upon our first meeting? Generally I think you need to know somebody for at least 20 minutes or have bought them dinner before one can reference their testicles. Bernard fufilled neither of these requirements. So, after a longer-than-we’d-like conversation, he said goodnight and went back next door to his site.

As we woke up this morning, we looked forward to a day full of driving, we were off to Amarillo, Texas. Before leaving, we updated the blog a bit, and while doing so, talked to Alicia. She recommended a little place called Monte Carlo’s Steakhouse in Albuquerque, NM. that she found on Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives. Alicia informed us, that part of its charm was that it was attached to a liquor store and to get to the restaurant, you had to go through the liquor store. Turns out, Amarillo is 10 hrs away, and Albuquerque was 5 hours. This was a perfect midway point for us to have dinner.

So, we broke down camp, and packed up the car, and off we went. Christine drove the first 5 hours to Albuquerque. As we entered NM, the sign welcomed us to “The Land of Enchantment”.

We pulled off an exit to get gas at a Pilot gas station. When Phil got out he was approached by a heavyset Mexican man with a very high pitched voice who asked him for money for gas. “Me and my son are headin’ to Denver, and we’re out of money and can’t get any gas. Could you help us out?” Phil replied quickly with a, “no sorry, we’re in the same boat buddy.” He quickly filled up as the man went from pump to pump, and we made our way out of the station very rapidly.

After the conversation with this man, one has to question the strategy involved with planning a trip and deciding to just kind of wing it on gas money. What was this man thinking before he left? One would posit, that if you were taking your automobile, gas money would be the first thing you would have.

A few good hours later, when we pulled into Monte Carlo’s, we thought, “Ohh crap, we’re going to get mugged.” The people were not the friendliest looking, covered with tattoos and angry faces, and then there was that guy sitting in the corner of the store drinking his Coronas. (Our minds will change about the place as we stay longer but for now… we’re a bit intimidated.)

We make our way to the back of the store, and enter the restaurant. It’s not too crowded, and there are a bunch of seats open. We are told to sit anywhere we’d like. We choose a booth in the back, and wait, and wait, and wait to be served. When our waitress finally comes over, she looks like she crawled out of a crack high. Her words were a bit slurred and she was a bit slow, but she was very pleasant.

There was no smoking or non-smoking section, and no one was smoking at the bar. However, before ordering, I went to the bathroom, where it STUNK like smoke. My first thought… hmm “Am I in high school again?” Then, once in the stall, there it was, an ash tray! Apparently you can’t smoke in the restaurant or bar area, but it’s fair game in the bathroom.

We ordered a Prime Rib and a Chili cheeseburger to split. When it came out, the burger looked as though it had pickles slathered all over the top. After a minor freak out, and asking what that was, she replied, it’s green chilies. Apparently a chili burger isn’t as we know it in NY with actual Chili, but with smashed green chilies on top. As unexpected as it was, it was a really nice addition to the burger. It added a sweet yet small spice flavor to the burger. The Prime rib was cooked to perfection with an amazing seasoning. We were both amazing happy with our meals.

As we were eating, the place began to fill up. Before we knew it, every table was full, and there was a line out the door. I overheard the waitress at the table next to us when they commented on the crowd, “Yea, ever since we got famous we’re always this busy. It’s crazy!” If Phil and I had gotten there even 10 – 15 minutes later than we did, we would have been in that line.

Just because we feel we have to get something from the attached liquor store to make this visit complete, I go up front and buy a 6-pack of Shiner Bock, which is regionally brewed in Shiner, Texas. I meet up with Phil as he’s paying the check, and we head out to the car to begin on the second half of our journey to Amarillo. And that’s where we are now, Phil’s driving and I’m sittin here typin away! :o)

The Grand Canyon.. Earning Its' Name

First and most importantly. Christine has temporarily lost her phone. If you call her please leave a phone number so she can call you back using Phil's phone. Thanks.

First off the part that caught me most by surprise about the Grand Canyon was the fact that it is found at the end of of a forest. From most pictures and views I had previously seen we were expecting more of a desert atmosphere. Instead we found trees and wild life, not the exact scene we had pictured in out minds heading into this endevour.

On the long road that leads to the canyon we saw many "look out for this animal being in the road" signs. The common deer sign, the elk sign (more common here), the panther sign and the cow sign. Huh? Wait? Cows crossing sign. Sounds odd right. After all who has ever heard of a wild cow walking through the forest. Silly Arizonian's and their signs.

When we speak of the Grand Canyon we must break it up into two separate and totally unequal parts. We first stumbled upon the North part of the canyon. There were cabins everywhere and lodge with a huge dining hall and theater all over looking the canyon. Very touristy and it was difficult to find some way to interact with the Grand Canyon like we had with the Bad Lands. We walked what we could and took what scenic photos we could, but in the end there wasn't a whole lot to do there.

We were planning to stay in that area for the night, but after planning it through we desided to make the 40 mile, 2.5 hour trip to our camp ground near the southern part of the canyon. You might be wondering, "How could it take 2 hours to go 40 miles?" Well, if you went directly across the canyon, like via airplane or helocopter it was 40 miles from canyon to camp ground. Unfortuniatly for us, the canyon is kind of in the way, and while the Aveo has been an off roading beast so far this trip, we didn't want to brave the journey. So we had to go back out the long winding road that led to the canyon, down a road going east, that leads around the canyon, and then a southen road to get where we had to be.

The next day we headed out for the Grand Canyon once again. This time we would be attacking from the south. When entering the park we came to the gaurd booth, where they collect your money and give you a pass. By this time we have been to so many National Parks that we now have a pass, and do not have to pay to enter. We got to the booth, showed the ranger our National Parks card and license as proof of identity. He looked at it and said, "New York, eh." To which Phil replied, "Yes, we have traveled very far to see your canyon."

Th good part was that the South was a lot better than the North was. Yes, this is one of the few times where the South actually beats the North in something, other than marrying one's own sister, or barbeque. There were many scenic overlooks and trails to walk around. At the Grand Viewpoint we actually walked down the majority of the canyon. We would have gone to the bottom, but didn't have water and had read earlier about people getting stuck down there and needing to be rescued due to dehydration or extreme fatigue. In retrospect we probably could have made it down to the bottom and back up, but at the time it wasn't worth the risk.




We took many pictures and have some great video footage, but it really does not do justice to what a spectacular scene and view and really is. The canyon really is grand. There were many times that we looked over the view and said that it was so beautiful, it almost didn't look real. It looked like a picture of a post card someone would buy and send you. The reds and tan colors of the mountains with sporadic greens sprouting off of them. The the blue and white horizon are a perfect contrast for the mountainous area and the shifting of the shadows from the sunlight provide a constantly changing dynamic. You could stay in one place all day and feel like you saw 9 different places around the area.

Oh Boise!

We arrived at Matt, Alicia and Eric's house around 7:30 am. Once there, Matt greeted us with a big smile and a warm hug. After some small talk and chit chat, Matt and his roommate Eric went out for a day of fishing which allowed Phil and me to catch up on some much needed shut eye.

Once we were awake, Phil and I went on some errands, (which included getting the oil changed in the car) and when we came back, Matt and Eric were hard at work in the kitchen. They treated us to a delicious home cooked meal of Filet, grilled corn on the cob, and Southwestern mashed potatoes. This was such a welcome treat from the fast food and hot dogs we’ve been eating so far. After dinner and (for some of us) a quick nap, we dressed to the nines and headed out into downtown Boise for a night of fabulous fun.

Downtown Boise is was a mere 10 minute cab ride from The house, and it is actually a very good time, despite what some of us might be thinking based on our Idaho stereotypes. We started the night off in a very Manhattan style, trendy lounge. After a drink there, we went to a much larger bar. Three stories high, where we sat outside on the roof and engaged in enthralling conversation.

The next morning, we woke up, tired and hungry. Matt and Eric took us to Capri’s, the “best breakfast place in all of Boise”. After all, the sign said it, so it must be true. Here we learned the there is another secret food group that no one in the Northeast talks about… Gravy.

Matt and Eric both got the chicken fried steak. They let us try a piece, and it had both Phil and I wishing we had ordered it too. Regardless, all the breakfasts were amazing, and mostly covered in this gravy we mentioned earlier. Biscuits and gravy, along with this chicken fried steak and gravy is a Midwestern/ southern treat that we feel everyone needs to know about. We might open up a dive in the Northeast that sells nothing but biscuits and gravy, and chicken fried steak and gravy.

After this amazing meal, Matt and Eric took us to the Boise River for a day of floating fun. Our journey got off to a rocky start as Phil took little time in blowing out a seam on our raft upon initial blowing up. We weren’t going to let a little thing like sinking spoil our fun, so we inflated what we could, and found our little raft to still be a sea worth vessel. The trip takes a little over an hour and is a relaxing way to spend the afternoon.

Following the boating trip, we went out for a little Mexican dinner and followed that up with some relaxation at home. We were all pretty exhausted from the rowing and being out in the sun all day, so the rest was much needed, especially for the drive we had ahead of us the next day to wonderful Salt Lake City, Utah.

On Monday we went over to the hospital Matt works a for a late lunch before we began out long journey on the road again. Christine had the taco salad, Phil had the turkey- pesto wrap, and we both had the creamy chicken tortilla soup, and all of it was yummy. We thanked Matt for being such a gracious host and for making such a delicious lunch and with that we were on our way… UTAH HERE WE COME!!

The last one... continued

We spent the rest of the night planning our “9 hour drive” from South Dakota to Wyoming to Boise. After dinner, we invited Roger and Eileen over for drinks and a fire. As the night was drawing to an end, and the fire was burning out, Christine decided she would “borrow” some wood from our biker neighbor Mark. It should be noted, that the wood she took was from his fire and was flaming at the time. It looked like she was carrying the Olympic torch with an oven mitt. In her defense, It was on fire, so Mark wasn’t gonna be taking it with him the following day it was being wasted over there in his fire pit with no one sitting around it.

The next morning at breakfast, we had some more fabulous biscuits and gravy (which by the way is a whole new entity we need to get into later on.) As we were devouring those, Roger and Eileen came over to say goodbye. We exchanged contact information and we look forward to hearing from them as they read the blog. (Hi guys!)

Shortly after breakfast, we packed up our car and headed up to Lead, South Dakota to hit the horseback riding trails. As we got to the Black Trail Ranch, we were greeted by Barbara and 3 of her dogs in a pickup. We jumped in the truck, and off we went to learn a bit about the Lead area. Barbara was full of tremendously interesting facts. We learned about the gold mining days of Lead and the men who were involved. At 26, Phil is a nearly dead man where the max age is usually 30 or so. When you think about that, a 15 year old boy is actually a middle aged man.

Then after another short ride around the ranch, we met our horses. Phil was given a beautiful black “show” horse named Patriot. Since he was supposed to be a show horse, he was very expensive, but in the words of Barbara, “he’s just too stupid to train.” So instead, he’s there to be ridden by the guests. I on the other hand was given a beautiful brown horse whose name described him perfectly, “Dusty”. He was a gorgeous and calm horse. Before we took off, she handed both Phil and I a stick, not a large stick, just a bit bigger than a twig. When I asked what the stick was for, she replied with the best possible answer, “Just to tell him that, Hey… I’ve got a stick!” She then went on to tell us that, this was to use with the horse and to tap his belly with when we wanted him to go.

As Barbara, Mindy (I think that was her horse’s name), Dusty and myself walked through the trails, we’d turn around to see Phil and Patriot off somewhere in the trees, a ways away from the trail. And as hard as Phil would kick him, or use his stick and say walk on, Patriot just stood there and ignored him. It wasn’t Phil’s fault, Patriot was just stubborn, and as Barbara explained it, “I think he does it just to entertain himself.”



After the trail the ride, Barbara helped us plan out our route to Idaho. She and I are going to contact each other during the school year so she can work with me and my students to teach them about rocks, and plants, and many other natureific things.

We left Black Trail Ranch with all intentions of heading to Sturgis to walk around the bike rally, just to experience it for a bit. However, we took a wrong turn (surprise, surprise) and ended up heading away from the rally. Since we were sort of in a time crunch to get to Idaho we decided against turning around. However, 25-30 years from now when I finally have my bike, we’ll head back to South Dakota and hit up Sturgis! :o)

We had plotted out the 8 or 9 hour drive from South Dakota to Boise in Phil’s head, however, Phil never took into account this state called Wyoming.

Wyoming took up the majority of the drive but it really has some absolutely spectacular scenery to look at. There were the Big Horn Mountains, that while long and cumbersome to travel across might have been one of the most beautiful scenery we’ve seen thus far.

After the Mountains, we approached Yellowstone National Park. As we got closer to the park, we saw a blinking sign that read:
Wild Fire Ahead
Drive with Caution

Once we saw the sign, we quickly realized that the cloud we originally thought was stemming from a looming thunderstorm was actually a smoke cloud coming from the fire. As we got closer, the smell of smoke got stronger and stronger. We began to even see little glowing areas in the woods which only grew bigger as we drove closer. It was a very intense sight to see, horrifying even. We got past the fire (or so we thought) and pulled into a “cut out” in the road, which happened to be the “Fire Fighter’s Memorial”. Slightly Ironic. There, along with another couple, we took pictures and watched in horrified awe just thinking and hoping that everyone on the mountain fighting the fire is okay.

As I mentioned before, we thought we had passed the fire, however, as we drove along, it only got worse. The little glowing areas were not much larger glowing areas. At one point, we saw flashing lights in the road. Cars were parked along the side of the street and people were out talking and taking pictures. It looked as though there were cops up ahead turning people around. Phil was getting ready to turn around on his own when we decided to go a little further to see the fire.

Luckily for us, they weren’t turning people around, and we were able to continue on with our route. However, when we got to the area with the flashing lights, neither one of us could believe how close the fire was to the road. It was absolutely intense. From the passenger seat, I was about an arms length away from the firemen and cops. And they were just on the edge of the fire. We passed on, and once on the other side of the fire, we saw another cut out where many more people were standing and watching.
As Barbara had told us while we were riding, to them, fires are their largest natural disaster. And that’s truly what this was. We did see a few Red Cross trucks there to help out as well.

About an hour or so later, we arrived at the front gate of Yellowstone National Park. The park ranger greeted us and excitedly told us how lucky we were because we were going to see another fire. We found it a bit odd that he was excited about this natural disaster, he sounded like Jim Cramer talking up Valero Stock.

Despite the darkness, as we drove through the park, we were still able to see the natural beauty and could only wish it were daytime. We arrived at the area where the ranger had told us we’d see the other fire. We could definitely smell it, and could see a bit of a glow through the trees, but this one seemed not to nearly as big as the first one.

We continued on driving, until we reached Boise. We learned some very fascinating things about Idaho when we were in Boise. We can’t wait to share these things with you in our next blog, “Ohhh Boise!”.

The Jewel Cave.. and other stuff

Following our trip to Rushmore and Crazy Horse we set up at our latest KOA camp in Custer, S.D. Our neighbor, Mark, was a biker on his way to Sturgis, for the bike rally. Sturgis has really been the elephant in the closet of this whole trip, the thing that has been showing predominanty in the background that we just haven't gotten around to discussing.

Sturgis is homed to the largest biker rally in the world. Roughly a million or so bikes converge to Sturgis during the first week in August for concerts, trading, and huge biker flea markets. It is currently in its' 68th year and really is a huge boost to the economy of many of the small towns with in a 60mile radius of Sturgis. How big and significant is the Sturgis Biker Rally you might ask?

While on the trip we have tried to get Carl a different shot glass from the different places we have visited. The place that didn't sell commemorative shot glasses, was Mount Rushmore, because they were only selling Sturgis shot glasses. Thats right, one of the most significant American monuments and they were selling Sturgis shot glasses and not their own.

The day after Rushmore we went out to the Jewel Caves for a tour of a caves. The caves were something like 26 stories below the surface of the Earth, and the temperature is 49 degees inside of them all year round. That would have been nice to know before getting to the cave in nothing but a t-shirt and shorts. I think they don't tell you before hand so you have to buy a sweatshirt from the gift store.

Interesting cave fact. The temperature of a cave will be the median temperature of ground above it. So if it is 94 in the winter and 30 in the winter the cave temperature will be 62 degrees year round.

Our guide on the tour, was a short, angry, ranger who gave quick explanations and yelled at a 5yr old for touching one of rocks in the cave. Apparently a 5yr old can break the cave and undo milions of years of formation and weathering. Here is the best picture of a cave that one can take with a cellphoneWhen we got back to camp, we were greeted by some familiar faces. The couple from The Wagon Wheel, who we had spent some time talking to at our last camp, had moved into the Custer camp and was a site or two away from us. Eileen and Roger... we will update later on, but wanted to get something up for now

The Rush to Rushmore

When we finally got onto 44 the ride to Rushmore was pretty smooth. It is rather direct and even I was able to make my way there with limited assistance from the Garmin, who may or may not have turned heal on us.

The good part about our next camp ground, was that it was ideal for the traveling we were doing today. The camp ground is about 5 miles from Crazy Horse, which is about 8 miles from Mt. Rushmore. We didn't quite realize this at the time of booking, but it really worked out for the best.

Getting up to Rushmore involves many windy hills and mountains, and around every turn you hope that around the corner you are going to see the mountain face. When you finally see the face (or I guess in this case faces) it really is an awesome spectacle. Here are some more cell phone pictures to prove it.

On the way to Rushmore I am not going to lie, I was expecting a bit of a let down. I mean how exciting can some heads on a mountain be, that I have already seen hundreds of thousands of times on TV or in books and magazines?

Well, it wasn't a let down. Mount Rushmore is amazing. As you make that final winding, turn and see the faces on the mountain, the initial feeling is a bit overwhelming. A sense of awe and amazement set it, that mere pictures cannot capture or give proper justice to. The faces look so alien on the rock framing, and that adds to the charm and grace of the monument. The sheer size of the faces embedded into the mountain make it a scene unto its own.

Much of the self guided tour of Rushmore is focused on the builder/ lead designer of Rushmore, Gutzon Borglum, and of course those president guys who actually make up the thing. The other part that is cool is being able to see the individual faces from many different angles and really being able to appreciate the work that went into it.

A few interesting fact about Rushmore:

1) Not one person died while making it.

2) Much of the blasting that needed to be done got workers to with in 6 inches of where they had to be carving.

3) Funding to Rushmore was cut with the onset of WWII. Gutzon Borgum died on his way to congress to appeal to them for more money.

4) Borgum's son, Lincoln Borgum was the one who actually "finished" the monument.

5) One of Borgum's assistance, Korczak Ziolkowski, went on to become the designer and builder of the Crazy Horse memorial about 8 miles from Rushmore.

Crazy Horse, was a famous Indian, yet at the memorial they only really focus on his quote of "My land is where my dead lie buried." Upon arrival, it doesn't look like anything more than half of a big head on a mountain. But there are many things about Crazy Horse that make it extremely interesting.

The first thing is that upon completion, you will be able to fit all of Mount Rushmore on Crazy Horse's head alone. The does not even include the size of Crazy Horse's outstretched, pointing arm, or his horse. The arm points out over land, that symbolized Crazy Horse's famous quote that is plastered around the Crazy Horse museum and monument ground.

Another interesting fact is that the builders of Crazy Horse do not accept one dollar of federal funding. All money that is used to build Crazy Horse comes from donations and money that is collected by people who visit Crazy Horse and pay the 10$ per person entrance fee. Apparently they find charging people 10$ a head a better way to raise money than say, oh I don't know, opening a casino, or pillaging cars in the Badlands.

They do no accept money from the federal government because Ziolkowski believed that if he began accepting federal funding from the government that the funding would be cut before completion of the project (See Mount Rushmore), leaving his vision incomplete. While Ziolkowski passed away before completion, his family still carries on the majority of building responsibilities and engineering. I should also note that for the first 5 years of the construction of Crazy Horse, Ziolkowski literally worked on making Crazy Horse by himself. Traveling all the way up the mountain by himself, and blasting, drilling, and carving all by himself.

Interesting stuff, horse riding comes next. We are in Boise now taking a 2 day sabbatical. More to come.

Things Get Good Leaving The Badlands

For the record we should note that buffalo and bison, are the same animal.

We packed up camp early Wednesday and began making our back through the Badlands en route to Mt. Rushmore. Our new campsite is a few miles outside of the Rushmore area in Custer. The trip through the Badlands was a bit different this time, as we went further in and had some really amazing experiences with some of the wild life there.

The trip began with a stop at one of the scenic viewpoints over looking a mountain area. We were standing there, admiring the view when we heard a distinct, "Baa" coming from the side of the mountainn across from us. On the mountain was a Long Horned Sheep, I believe was the name of the animal. You could hear the hooves clacking against the mountain as the sheep navigated its way over ledges, cliffs and narrow walk ways to make its way. To the people watching it seemed like every step it took, it looked like it was going to fall. Yet, the animal still moved with a grace and agility that showed it was more than comfortable walking on the steep terrain.

If this was the only animal interaction we had durring the day it would have been pretty cool. But as usual, business picked up later.

We drove on, and instead of taking the road that would take us to route 90, we stayed on the scenic gravel road through the back end of the Badlands. The scenic gravel road was just that, scenic and gravel and it went on for about 20miles. We passed the ocassional car about once every 10minutes or so, but other than that it was mostly open plains and prairie dogs. Christine finally got her view of a herd of buffalo, off in a distant plain and for me that was good enough. I wanted no part of seeing any buffalo up close after the story Janice had told us last night.
Needless to say, we saw some more buffalo about 10minutes down the road.

When we came upon the herd in the middle of the road, I was scared and ready to turn around. If a buffalo can ruin an RV, imagine what it can do to an Aveo and the people inside. Christine grabbed the camera and said we should trudge forward. There were people on top the hill in cars and they were more or less just driving slowly through the herd, waiting for the buffalo to move around them. Seeing those people go, gave me the courage to go on through as well.

We took video of the herd, but it looks like a cross between a bad animal planet video and the Blair Witch Project. We unfortunately took the video with the regular video camera, so in order to put it up here, we re-taped it off of the video camera screen using the internet camera. It's quite blurry, and may cause you severe dizziness and possibly even nausia.



Now, here are a few pictures that we managed to grab with the cellphone camera, but it really doesn't give justice to how close we were to them, or the sheer size and sounds of these animals.

Needless to say we made it through all of them alive. They actually wound up going toward our car, and up the hill behind us, so we got through them faster than the people at the top of the hill who wound almost traveling with the herd down the road. The disturbing part happened when the buffalo had all but crossed the road and one of cars decided to be cute and honk at the buffalo. The buffalo didn't do anything, but still is there any reason to even risk having one of them charge you?

We eventually got out of the Badlands and continued along another dirt road when we left. Apparently South Dakota isn't big on paving back area roads, and even worse the Garmin is even better at finding them. As we left I saw a sign that said, Route 44, 11miles -->. I glanced at the map and knew that 44 would get us to Mt. Rushmore, but instead I listened to the Garmin.

Remember how in an earlier blog, we showed a picture of the Garmin bringing us into a corn field. Well same thing this time. Only the corn fields do actually have small dirt roads to travel on, so rather than going with what I knew to be true, I listen to the GPS system. After all it's the direction professional.

Disaster. We literaly drove through single lane cornfields for about a half hour. Some of them ended with a sign that read, "Private Property: No Tresspassing", others just ended with no road to follow at all. I think driving through all this dirt, gravel and single lane fields, literlaly took about 2,000miles off the life of the Aveo, who I have a growing respect for on a near hourly basis now. I finally got sick of listening to the Garmin, who gave great directions if I was plowing a field, turned it off and went back the way we came.

We wound up getting to the road that led to Route 44, that we had seen almost 45 minutes ago, as we left the Badlands. Keep in mind this entire road is a dirt road. So even though it has a name and leads to a major road way, we still kicked up dust, dirt and gravel for the entire time we were on it.

This got us to Keystone and where Mt. Rushmore lies. Where we begin the next part of our story.

Welcome to Interior!

This is Pat. He is one of the 50 or so people who make up the small South Dakotan town of Interior. We didn't meet too many people. But from our small sampling, they were friendly, and enjoyed the "mellow" feeling of living in such a laidback, out of the way place. Looking at Pat he seems like a happy go lucky guy, but I think this small town is a place he went to, to escape from something bigger, to help him forget about some sadness in the past. I think that's the reason many of the people living in such a small place go there.


As we left the Badlands and began our way back to our campground, we passed a few signs for "The Wagon Wheel", a bar in the town of Interior, South Dakota, that according to the signs serves this, "Ice Cold Beer". We figured we hadn't stopped at single bar in a single state yet, so what better place to go that a dive bar, in a dive town, half a mile outside of the Badlands.

Now the Wagon Wheel isn't just the local town bar. Oh no. It also serves as its' gas station. Pay inside the bar, and then pump your gas at the pump across the street. We walking in, slowly, mildly afraid for our lives, while locals at the "mini-casino" machines found inside, gave us some quick glances. They weren't nasty looks, just glancing over to see if they knew who was coming in. You get the feeling they either see a lot of strangers, or mostly people they know by name.

We went to the bar and ordered a couple of Miller Lites. The bartender gave them to us and told us that would be 4$. Christine and I were kind of confused by this. "Wait.. 4$ each?" asked Christine. "No, 4$ total, 2$ each," the bartender replied. We explained to him, that being from New York, 4$ for a beer was about right, and we were just a bit confused initially by the price. He simply shrugged his shoulder and said, "Small town, ya know."

We started talking to the bartender for a bit and learned his name was D.J. and he was actually an import from California. We asked him about the school we had seen coming in and how many kids actually went there. He told us about 20 students, total go there. Or roughly about 5-7 kids less than a single NYC school CLASS has. He went on to say how once they graduate, the nearest middle and high schools are a good 40 miles from there, and they have to make the trip every day.

He went on to say how there is really no police presence of any sort out it Interior. "About once a month or every month and a half a statey will come in," he said, "but that’s about it." When we asked if the town had a mayor he replied, "I think you need more than 100 people to be considered a town, and no there is no mayor." He went on to tell us that the nearest hospital was probably 100miles away. Now that is the type of thing that really would have put a damper on my 'get bitten by rattle snake, so I can go to the hospital, away from the bugs' plan.

This is about the time that Pat walked in and business picked up.

As Pat walked in D.J. noted how “this is good people coming in,” and he introduced us to Pat as he sat down. D.J. then poured Pat a Bloody Mary…8 parts vodka, 1/2 part tomato juice, the “Pat Special.” This deviated from his norm of a Bloody Mary with a beer and tomato juice mixture, which is his normal drink of choice. Now, Christine and I had never heard of this but apparently out here it is common place to have Bloody Mary mixed that way. How common you might as? It comes in cans, and is actually not half bad. Lighter and bubblier than your normal vodka laced Bloody Mary drink, with a nice carbonation that helps it go down.

Pat was ecstatic to hear we were newly weds and began talking about his own wife and family. It was sweet to see how much he cares about his wife, and how fortunate and lucky he feels to have her. He then went into how many kids they have, “Two, well we had four, but we lost two of them, we won’t go into that. So two.” Pat then took a large swig of his Bloody Mary and Christine gave me 10$ to go win her money playing video poker.

As I am playing video poker with my back to the bar, Christine is talking to D.J and Pat about the Badlands and how I was a bit nervous going into it. She called me over to explain why. "Well my old roommate from college was telling me that if you like run out of gas, or have a break down in the wrong section of the Badlands, like Indians will come out of the mountain and pillage your vehicle. "

There was a brief pause and D.J. responded with, "Well I am Indian and I haven't pillaged your car yet.. What do you think this is 1880!!" Ugh. Have I mentioned I hate Donny. "Of course that's not true," D.J continued, "That sort of stuff doesn't happen any more it's 2008. Have I mentioned I really, really hate Donny. D.J went on to tell a story of how some Swedish tourist asked him a similar question based on Dances With Wolves and it got the guy punched in the face. I of course, immediately apologized, and said I didn't mean to offend him, and that in this case, my ignorance of the area and people there led me to think it as true. Besides, how could Donny be wrong about something like this?

At this point I go back to playing video poker and D.J pours Pat another "Pat Special," this is bad news for Pat as his wife is coming to the bar to hang out and he isn't aloud to drink hard liquor any more. Apparently they frown on that after going through detox. I am not sure if the drinking was as much because he lost two children, or because he literally has nothing nothing else to do in a town this small, as someone pointed out later.

Janice shows up. She looks tired, and pissed that Pat called her to come and meet us. She works in the Badlands cleaning the bathrooms at various viewpoints. On her off days she works in a local hotel... cleaning bathrooms. Pat meanwhile, claims to be the local handy man in town and can fix anything. Of course, in a town of 50people, just outside of a desert, one has to question how many lawn mower engines one can fix, to support a steady income.




Now a lovely couple walks into the bar, who have no business being in Interior, so it is clear that these people are tourists, like Christine and I. They sit down a order a pizza, and we all get to talking. Funny enough the last place there were was at Indy for the race, and are now staying at the same camp ground we are. Seemingly tracing our steps a half a day or so behind us. They were nice people, from Detroit, and wound up spending some time talking with them as well.

By this point in time it should be noted that Pat was hammered, and he kept on coming up to us and Detroit couple and saying, "Welcome to Interior!"

We wound up meeting the Detroit couple the next day at breakfast and we reflected on the previous evening at The Wagon Wheel. The people, Pat, the small town. How there isn't much to do other than go to a bar. All the locals we spoke to, D.J., Pat, and Janice all said the same thing about Interior, it is "mellow", but really nothing else positive to say about it. I guess I just found it odd that people would choose to separate themselves so much from the rest of society. I can understand appreciating it being "mellow", but they really had nothing else to say that was good about living there. Just weird for me I guess, but to them home.

Interior: A nice place to visit briefly, but I wouldn't want to live there.

The Bad(ass)lands

This next part of the story needs to be told in 4 separate parts. 1) Leaving for the Badlands, The Badlands, 2) Post Badlands (Welcome to Interior!) and 3) Leaving the Badlands and 4) The Rush to Rushmore.

Before we left our KOA campsite in Belvidere SD we talked to the people who owned the place and talked with them about visiting the Badlands and the best way to go about doing it. I know what you are asking yourself right now, "Was the camp in Belvidere run by an overweight Englishman?" and "Were there any Bob Euker sightings?" The answer is "no" to both.

The couple who ran the place were a lovely couple, Betty and her husband, we'll call him George. George looks like actor/comedian George Lopez, but sounds like professional wrestler Razor Ramon when he speaks, meaning that whenever he said, "The badlands," I had to chuckle a bit inside.

Instead of stopping at our camp, just outside the Badlands we decided it would be a good idea to go directly to the Badlands, so we could go there and explore, before we had an opportunity to sit down and get tired. On our way to the Badlands Christine and I stopped off at a "scenic viewpoint" of a grassy field. Christine found this the chance to get her picture taken next to a hay bail. One of those huge, rolled up ones you see a lot in farm country. So we walked over to the hay bail, through a tall grass, insects (big surprise) and tiny cactus. We walked carefully through the field, in case there were snakes or anything harmful all the while trying to avoid stepping on a cactus.

So we get to the hay bail, and Christine needs a boost to get on top. She puts her foot into my cuffed hands and I feel a horrid stinging sensation. Cactus. She had stepped on a cactus and it stuck to her shoe, which in turn stuck into my hand. Needless to say Christine didn't get on top of the hay bail, rather she settled for a picture on the side of it.

Our second stop on the way to the Badlands was at this sign. If you can't see the name of the town, it is "Philip". And there underneath it is me.. Philip, how appropriate. This required yet another trip through a high, insect ridden field.

Now we pick up business and get to the actual Badlands. The Badlands really are fantastic. The weathered mountains and scenery that seems to go on for miles are really breath taking and a spectacle like no other. We started off at the "window/ door" part. The window is one of the giant rock structures that people can climb on, while getting a view of part of the Badlands and taking pictures. The next part is the door, that leads into a decent section of the Badlands that people can walk through. Here are some of the pictures we took while in the Badlands. Please keep in mind there were taken with my cellphone camera and we have much better ones along with some spectacular video we can show when we get home.

After looking at the door/window area we decided to go to our camp site, set up our tent, unpack, eat lunch and head back out to the Badlands. We were both exhausted and I think that neither one of us would have argued with each other if we had decided to pack it in and stay there for the day. There were 3 major things that kept us from staying. 1) The heat. It was just way too hot to stay there and do nothing. The Badlands at least had a nice breeze. 2) We had traveled all this way and didn't want to rush the next day spending time exploring the Badlands and going to Mount Rushmore. 3) I was once again being eaten by bugs. I cannot really express how many bug bites I have gotten in our last 2 camp sites. Thankfully, the Badlands is a desert and there are few (if any) mosquitoes there.

So we go back to the Badlands where I notice this sign.

I am not going to lie. I think at this point I was rooting to be bitten by one. For a few reasons. The first being, that there as no way a rattle snake bite could be half as bad as the 10,000 mosquitoe bites I have received in the last 4 days. The second reason is, if I get bitten, I can at least spend a few days in a hospital bed, away from all the bugs and mosquitoes (I would find out later that this probably wasn't a good idea). Finally, if I get bitten I can yell, "My God! The rattlesnake as struck!!"

Well, I didn't get bitten and we wound up climbing up "Settler's Point". It was a narrow, steep trail that settlers used to have to climb down with their horses and they now allow people to climb it, so they can see how difficult the original settlers had it. I wasn't impressed. It was a pretty easy climb, so in this case I was left little unimpressed by the hardships the settlers faced.

When we reached the top we saw this bunny rabbit. Apparently bunny rabbits here have little fear, as this guy let us get up very close to him to take a picture.

The next fun thing we saw was a field filled with Prairie Dogs. We have some great video of this, unfortunately we cannot load it up here. They were cute little things, made these weird high pitched noises and probably hated the fact that there were so many people stopping to walk over their field to look at them. I had a picture on my cellphone, but it came out too blurry to be able to actually put up.

We finally left at around 6p.m and instead of going right back to camp, we headed into the town of Interior, South Dakota. We will continue our story of Interior in our next blog. This story involves a small town, Donny almost getting me killed 10,000miles away and a bizzare mixture for a Bloody Mary.